The Red Train

Rahul got stuck at the railway signal - again. Of course, this was inevitable. After all, Atul chacha was never late. Chacha halted his auto rickshaw in front of Rahul's house at 9 a.m. He did not honk; he wasn't one of those people. Rahul, too, was bound by his own chains of punctuality. He couldn't make anybody wait. They reached the railway signal at 9:20 a.m. As he watched Rose pass by like she always did, Rahul wondered if she recognized him. It'd been almost a year since he'd been following this routine, and the red train never failed to say hello.

The 12X14 room, or Rahul's house, was perfectly neat. He had to keep it that way. He just had to. As he lay on his bed that night, he felt restless. Something wasn't right. He got up several times to ensure that the doors and windows were locked, and his bag packed for the next day. His clothes were ironed too. What was bothering him then?

The next morning was no different. Rahul looked out of the auto rickshaw at 9:20. He knew that she would greet him customarily. But Rose was nowhere in sight. "How can this be?" he asked Atul chacha. Chacha turned back and smiled, "Maybe you are ready." "Ready? Ready for what?!" Rahul asked him to stop the vehicle, and began looking for her at a terribly frantic pace. He inquired with every single soul in sight, but nobody would speak about her. What if she'd already left? He raced along the railway line to catch up with her. He raced till he ran out of breath, till he tripped over. And his eyes opened to the white ceiling of his 12X14. "Phew, a dream!" he thought to himself. He dove into a blissful slumber.

Atul chacha arrived on time, and Rahul was ready. As chacha braked his three-wheeled carriage just ahead of the railway track, Rahul peeped, and then, somehow, he couldn't sit there any longer. He sprinted towards the track and started running along it, just like he did in his dream. He saw her approaching him, and this time, he wouldn't let her go. He ran towards her. He ran and he ran. He did not stop; at least not till he was breathing.



I had taken an alternative route to office that day, and I ended up being stranded for over an hour, somewhere close to a rail line. I saw a man squatting on the side of the road with his hands holding his head, looking extremely grieved and lost. He was wearing the uniform of an auto rickshaw driver. I walked up to him and asked him what the matter was. "I'm so forgetful," he said. "If only I could remember his name." He was talking to himself. "His wife died here, exactly a year ago. Just like he did. Can you imagine?" I didn't know what to tell him, but he was completely unaware of my presence. "I took him for his daily visits to the doctor. He could never get over her death. His wife. What was her name? I think it was the name of a flower. Or was it? I'm so forgetful. If only I could remember her name."

Who Am I?

Hello darling, it's been so long. How have you been? Do you know me, you ask? But of course you do! It breaks my heart that I have to remind you, how you loved me and placed me above everyone else, how you looked for every possible chance to be with me, how you spent your days and nights in my arms. Why else would I be speaking to you today, when you don't even remember me?

It only seems like yesterday that we met, hours after you were born. Years passed by, and we became inseparable. You'd be ready with endless excuses to see me, irrespective of where you were. Your parents never understood why you enjoyed being with me, but they let us be. For some reason, they had faith in me, and they knew I'd keep you happy, which I always did. I'd sneak into your classrooms and meeting rooms to pay you a visit. Neither your teachers nor your bosses liked me, and your better half was always jealous of me, but you never cared! I gave you company both in your good times and bad - when you went for picnics with your family, after you finally received your first job offer, when you were sad about leaving college, when you were travelling places, when you were tolerating a horrible movie, when you were tired after a hard day's work, or when you were sick. In some of our meetings, I'd take you to mysterious places with unknown faces, and you'd love those journeys. Oh, how I miss those days!

Sweetheart, I know I've been mischievous now and then, but I never meant to hurt you. I didn't realize that hide-and-seek with me would torment you so much, when you always enjoyed the game with your friends. I was just being playful, I swear! At times, I'd arrive late to see you, but only when you reeked of coffee, which I cannot stand. Then, there were days when I lured you into spending more time with me, and you ended up being late for work. Yet, that was only when I thought you really needed to be with me! Those mysterious journeys I accompanied you on, might have been scary at times, though my part was only to take you there. The demons belonged to you, and I'm sorry I couldn't take them away. Maybe I wronged you with my childish misconduct, and that's why we aren't together anymore.

Too many barriers stand between us today - barriers made of anger, tension, anxiety, and stress. I can no longer hold your hand, let alone embrace you like I used to. This is but a last attempt of mine to bring you back to me. I want you in my arms, but not when it is too late, and your body is cold and lifeless. Because then, even though you will be with me forever, I will not feel the warmth of your presence or hear the sound of your heartbeat. My love, I know you can still hear me. Please, darling. Please come back to me.